Colin's big day

Note to self: on the night before your first child starts Kindergarten, do not--I repeat, do NOT--try to read "The Kissing Hand." Even if you've read it before. A zillion times. And you love the book. And you know it is a perfect book to read on the night before the first day of school. And you think think think you can get through it without shedding tears.

You can not get through it without shedding tears!!!

Ahem.

If you don't know this book, the gist of the story is that little Chester Racoon does not want to go to school. His mother reassures him that she will always be 'with him' by telling him the very old secret in their family of 'The Kissing Hand'.

Excerpt:

Mrs. Raccoon took Chester's left hand and spread open his tiny fingers into a fan. Leaning forward, she kissed Chester right in the middle of his palm.

Chester felt his mother's kiss rush from his hand, up his arm, and into his heart. Even his silky, black mask tingled with a special warmth.

Mrs. Raccoon smiled. "Now," she told Chester, "whenever you feel lonely and need a little loving from home, just press your hand to your cheek and think, 'Mommy loves you. Mommy loves you.' And that very kiss will jump up to your face and fill you with toasty warm thoughts."

She explains that, no matter what Chester does--like, eating or washing his hands--the kiss will always stick. So, Chester decides that he can do it. He stands in front of his school on the first night, thoughtful.

Suddenly, he turned to his mother and grinned.

"Give me your hand," he told her.

Chester took his mother's hand in his own and unfolded her large, familiar fingers into a fan. Next, he leaned forward and kissed the center of her hand.

"Now you have a Kissing Hand, too," he told her. And with a gentle "Good-bye" and "I love you", Chester turned and danced away.

Mrs. Racoon watched Chester scamper across a tree limb and enter school. And as the hoot owl rang in the new school year, she pressed her left hand to her cheek and smiled.

The warmth of Chester's kiss filled her heart with special words.

"Chester loves you," it sang. "Chester loves you."

*sigh*

This morning, however, I did really well. We got up, got dressed, ate breakfast, and took some pictures. Everything was going great, and all involved were very happy and excited!

The boys

Colin in front of the door, insistent upon showing off the backpack that 'he picked out!'

In front of our tree....
....and the front door.

Then it was off to my friend Jen's house to drop off Cam and E while I took Colin in. I knew there was a potential of staying with Col for a bit, so it was easier just being the two of us.

I was fine. Until I left Jen's house and began walking to the van, where Colin was waiting. Then, I started to feel a bit sick to my stomach, knowing what I was getting ready to do. I managed to hold it all together though. We got to the school, parked, snapped a picture.....


....prayed, and then filed in with all of the other children. I showed Colin the way to his classroom, and as soon as he walked in, you could just tell that everything was going to be great!

Hanging up his backpack

Finding 'his' seat

He looked so small to me in that big classroom!

He soon found a friend

Putting away his supplies

Time for some instructions!

Then, Colin's teacher led us all on a tour of the school.

We got to see the library....

....and the gym, along with restrooms, the nurse's station, the office, and the other classes.

Then, we headed back to the classroom. Mrs. W. instructed all of us that she was going to be reading the children a story now, and then they were going to have an assembly in the gym. Parents were welcome to stay as long as they wanted, but many started filing out....and I took my cue.

I went over to Colin, and told him that I was going to leave now. That lump was forming.

He said to me, "Okay, Mommy! See you in a little while."

And then, I opened up his little fingers and spread them out into a fan. I kissed his hand, and gently closed his fingers back into a fist. He looked up at me with a big knowing smile and said, "Now, you'll always be with me Mommy!" I gave him a big hug, whispered that, yes, I would always be with him. I kissed him again, and left.

Then I stood in the hall and cried.

But I watched him. He didn't look back. Not once.

He's gonna do great. That's my comfort.

We were back in about an hour to pick him up. As well as I know he did, his face still lit up when he saw me in the car pick-up line. (Mine lit up even brighter, I'm fairly certain.) He had to show me his goody bag from his teacher....

....and then promptly share the goods with Cameron.

Hard. Sad. Happy. Sad. Exciting. Emotional. Sad.

But, somehow, it was still a good day.

**I'm so proud of you buddy, and I love you so much.

I can't wait to see what this year brings for you!**