I've sat down to the computer more than a few times....and then I get up again, having written nothing. I simply can't think of what to say. Or how to say it.
I was all prepared to come home yesterday from our Chicago trip and share all the fun that we had there--pictures of the zoo, and of the boys fishing with Grandpa--but that whole plan changed when life itself changed in a major way yesterday morning.
If you haven't already seen on Facebook, my sister- and brother-in-law lost their sweet newborn baby girl yesterday morning. Aimee went into labor in the middle of the night; they went to the hospital pretty quickly, because her water had broken; everything was seemingly going along just fine; and then: BAM. Life changed. Something went south....and Aimee was rushed into an emergency C-section to deliver the baby. But, as God had planned it (and in Aimee's own words), by that time, she was already in His arms.
I feel so fortunate that we, by God's design, were up in Chicago visiting this week, and got a chance to see Aimee, Roger, and the baby yesterday before heading back home. It was an unbelievably difficult day; but I know that I will forever be thankful that I got to hold that sweet baby girl. Even if it was only for a few moments.
Aimee and Roger are doing incredibly well. Their faith and testimony has been so encouraging. They know that this, as hard as it is, was God's perfect design for their family.
Still....there is incredible sadness. I, for one, have been able to think of little else since we got that call yesterday morning. My heart is so, so heavy. So are the hearts of many others: our entire family, Aimee's family, and so many friends that are close with Aimee and Roger. I will grieve this loss for days and days. For months.
I can not physically imagine being in their shoes at this moment.
Yet, I can tell you one very certain thing: if I were ever in this situation, I hope and pray that God would give me the grace and strength that He is providing Roger and Aimee right now. They are just being such a light for Christ in this dark world.
God says that He will never, ever give us more than we can handle. To me, that just proves their deep strength in Christ--He knew that, as difficult that this situation would be for the two of them, that they would be able to handle it. Because their faith, their trust, their hope is in Him.
The God of all comfort.
Please, if you haven't already, be in prayer for our family. Especially for Aimee and Roger--that their hearts would heal and that Christ will draw so near to them and would comfort them. And, thank you to the ones who have already been praying. Your comments, emails, and messages mean more than you know.
This morning in church for the offering, I played the song "Does Jesus Care?" with tears streaming down my face. I don't really know, quite honestly, how I even got through it--I could barely see the notes through the blurriness of my own tears. But the chorus of this song just encourages me so much that I wanted to share it. No matter what you may be going through in your own life right now, Jesus sees. He knows. And, he cares about what is going on.
Does Jesus care when my heart is pained
too deeply for mirth and song?
As the burdens press, and the cares distress
and the way grows weary and long?
Oh yes, He cares--
I know He cares!
His heart is touched with my grief.
When the days are weary, the long nights dreary,
I know my Savior cares.