A "Yes" Mommy

There are so many times that I find myself saying "No" to my boys.


Then, I think about it.....and I wonder exactly why it is that I just said no.


Sometimes, I turn right around and say, "Oh, never mind guys--it's okay. Go ahead and do fill-in-the-blank."


But, not all the time.


Mostly, I find myself saying no to my boys because of my own selfish reasons.


When Colin comes to me and says, "Mom? Can we built a fort in the living room?"


"I don't think so, buddy." I really don't feel like having to re-fold the 47 blankets you are sure to drag out to build your fort.


"Can we go swimming at Aunt Karen's, Mom?"


"Not today, guys." It's too much work for me to have to watch all three of you while you're swimming...and besides, I would really much rather grab a raft and float around on it for a few short hours. Plus, I have so much work to do around this house....


"Mommy, can we please stop at Old McDonald's for lunch and play? Pleeeeease?"


"No, boys, we have to get home now." I'm so tired....and don't you know by now how much I hate that place? That germ-ridden, overrun-with-disobedient-and-loud-children, nothing-good-for-you-on-the-menu place? Ugh!

The scenarios could go on and on.

It's my own laziness. Selfishness.


I want to stay in my own content little area and keep as much peace and normalcy as possible. What you are doing is asking me to come out of my little circle, and I just don't feel like it right now!


Even though I am working on it, my normally-perfectionist-mindset still takes the reigns--with full force--some days.


That is why, when I read Jill Savage's post yesterday, I was so excited: she was giving me just the thing to say "yes". A challenge!


When her boys asked her to "see if it was hot enough to actually FRY an egg on the sidewalk!!" the other day, she confessed that her initial feeling was "No!" But, as she thought about her reasoning behind saying no, she realized that it was her own reservations, stemming from selfishness--not wanting to waste an egg or clean it up off the sidewalk, etc.--that was making that decision for her.


What she thought instead was, "What would this hurt?" And, she let them give it a go--with their promise of cleaning up the egg when they were done.


I saw a very accurate reflection of myself in what she was saying, and I confess--I don't want to be that kind of mother.


We've always said that we make it a point around our house to say "yes" as often as we can to the boys--because there is so much in this world that we are going to have to say "no" to because of safety or boundary reasons. At least, we say that we've made it a point to do that. In reality, I find myself saying "no" a lot more than I am saying "yes" lately.


And, this month, I'm working to change that.


This is the first of what I hope will be a post each day of July on how I said "yes" to my children that day, when I really would have rather said "no"--and the 'something great' that came out of it.


{Also, for clarification: these are things that do not involve safety issues or parental boundaries. I am not advocating to tell a four-year-old that they can go to the park by themselves just because they asked, and just so that a Mom can say "yes". What I am talking about are those things like I mentioned above in my post, or things like what Jill mentioned.}


I started off the challenge yesterday: with a trip to Old McDonald's. My stomach did not thank me later, but the smiles on the kids' faces when we pulled in the parking lot was, quite possibly, the highlight of my day. A chorus of "Yes!! Yay!! Thanks Mommy! YAAAAAY!!" filled the van.


It was great.


Today, despite the fact that it is 62 degrees (on July 1st? Wha??) and raining, we went outside to play. I can't remember the last time when I've let them play in the rain.....but they loved it. "Mom! Mom!! It's like we're in the shower--but outside!! And with all our clothes on!!"


I sat in the garage and froze....but it really was worth it.


(Side note: apparently, playing in the rain really wears children out. I'm going to have to remember that one....)


Anyone that wants to get in on this challenge is certainly free to head on over to Jill's blog and check out all the details. I apologize in advance if you get tired of hearing all the things I said "yes" to! But, I am so very excited to see what this challenge brings--and where it brings ME!!